“Scarcity Under the Sun”

Part 2: Singleness

 

A Sermon on Ecclesiastes 4:6-12

 

November 17, 2002

 

by Rev. Stephen C. Magee

Exeter Presbyterian Church

TEXT: Ecclesiastes 4:1-12: Scarcity Under the Sun

                Part 1 - Oppression and Envy - (4:1-6)

                Part 2 - Singleness - (4:6-12)

 

OPPRESSION          1 Then I returned and considered all the oppression that is done under the sun:

                                And look! The tears of the oppressed,

                                But they have no comforter --

                                On the side of their oppressors there is power,

                                But they have no comforter.

                                2 Therefore I praised the dead who were already dead,

                                More than the living who are still alive.

                                3 Yet, better than both is he who has never existed,

                                Who has not seen the evil work that is done under the sun.

 ENVY                     4 Again, I saw that for all toil and every skillful work

                                a man is envied by his neighbor.

                                This also is vanity and grasping for the wind.

LAZINESS               5 The fool folds his hands

                                And consumes his own flesh.

 

ON THE OTHER HAND...

                6 Better a handful with quietness

                Than both hands full, together with toil and grasping for the wind.

 

SINGLENESS

                7 Then I returned, and I saw vanity under the sun:

                8 There is one alone, without companion:

                He has neither son nor brother.

                Yet there is no end to all his labors,

                Nor is his eye satisfied with riches.

                But he never asks,

                "For whom do I toil and deprive myself of good?"

                This also is vanity and a grave misfortune.

                9 Two are better than one,

                Because they have a good reward for their labor.

                10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.

                But woe to him who is alone when he falls,

                For he has no one to help him up.

                11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm;

                But how can one be warm alone?

                12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.

                And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

 

Introduction: It is Not Good for the Man to be Alone

 

            The first place in the Scriptures where we confront the problem of being alone is in the second chapter of Genesis.

Genesis 2:18

        18 And the LORD God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him."

            There are two words in this verse that need further comment.  The first is the word "helper,"  which is the same word which is normally translated "help" in the Scriptures.  This is no small help, but a strong help like the help of God Himself, as in Psalm 124:

 Psalm 124:8

        Our help is in the name of the LORD, Who made heaven and earth.

            On a human level, this word is used to talk about the help that comes from fresh reinforcements in battle, at a time when you are about to be overpowered by your enemies (Ezekiel 12:14).  It is the absence of this "help" that is Adam's problem in the garden, a situation which is declared to be "not good," the first such pronouncement in the history of revelation.

            The second word that should be considered is translated here "comparable" and it is a very difficult word to translate.  It means literally "like-opposite-him."  She is like him, but also opposite him, and is in that sense to be a very strong helper who will be a complement to him, a companion for him.  To be without her is to be without a very strong and important help.  When she is not there, someone is missing.

            God moves ahead to solve this problem without the aid of Adam:

Genesis 2:21-25 21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. 23 And Adam said:

        "This is now bone of my bones

        And flesh of my flesh;

        She shall be called Woman,

        Because she was taken out of Man."

 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

            The reaction of Adam to the provision of God sounds too clinical or detached in our translation.  He literally says, "This one! Now! Bone of my bones! Flesh of my flesh! ..."  A great problem has been addressed through God's provision of appropriate companionship, and a family society has begun that will be the pattern and plan of God for the future.  All is well, though this team will soon work together not for good, but against the provision and commandment of God.  Yet the entrance of representative sin into the world through Adam in Genesis 3, does not change the goodness of the gift of God to him in Genesis 2.  To be without this companionship is, generally speaking, a scarcity.  Something - someone- is missing.

 

The Problems of Being Alone

 

            In the passage in Solomon's great book of wisdom which is before us this morning, we take a deeper look, first, at the specifics that make the condition of being alone, generally speaking, not good.  I want to point out five things from the text that help us to see the problems of being alone.

 

1.  Crisis of Meaning is Acute (v. 7-8)

 

            First, while all of humanity must face the challenges of this fleeting world, and must wonder concerning the purposes of our labor under the sun, this situation is particularly pointed for the person who finds himself all alone.  At this point I want to read you the words from the original Hebrew in the order that they appear to give you a second look at the problem discussed in verse 8:

There's one - and there is not a second.

Indeed a son nor a brother there is not to him.

And there is no end to all his labor.

Also his eye is not satisfied - riches.

"And for whom I labor

and causing to be lacking my soul of good."

This also is vanity, and an evil business.

            The New King James says, "But he never asks" and then proceeds with the obvious question of why am I working so hard when there is no one to give the rewards of my labor to.  The New International Version takes a different approach, and has the toiling single person asking himself the question.  "He asked" that translation says.  Either way, the question just appears there in the Hebrew as the thought of his troubled heart.  He continues to labor and toil, and the fleeting nature of it all seems so clear.  It is not simply that he perceives the vanity of it more clearly than the man with a family.  This is true, but it is also that the actually case is more troubling.  The family man will pass on his wealth, and within a matter of some time it will all be forgotten and gone.  The single man has no one to give it to.  "Why am I bothering to toil?"  He plagues himself with the thought.

 

2.  Economic Challenges (9)

 

            In addition to this substantial problem, the man who is alone can not take advantage of any division of labor and specialization.  he must do it all.  Verse 9 tells us that two are better than one on this point, that two who work well together can bring in a better yield from their efforts.  There are times when we consider in our minds, "I would be better off alone."  But this is one of the challenges that people have to face when they are alone.

 

3.  Danger from Accidental Troubles (10)

 

            The third point comes in verse 10 where we hear of one who has fallen and can not get up.  This is not only about a physical fall.  There are times when we find ourselves emotionally or spiritually weak, and we need someone else to help us with the challenge that we face. 

 

4.  Coldness of Life Without Companionship (11)

 

            In the fourth place, when we are alone we experience a lack of the warmth of human companionship.  While verse 11 could be used to speak of the blessings of any kind of companionship, and therefore the difficulty of living without the warmth of that blessing, it is my conclusion that the life of marriage is very likely in view.  My reason for this conclusion is that there are three words that are used by Solomon that all have double meanings, where the second meaning goes beyond physical lying down and physical warmth, and speak euphemistically regarding the warmth of lying down together in sexual intimacy.

            The final word of the Bible regarding sex is not "No."  It is "Yes."  While this, or any other good gift of God can be used in bad ways, that does not change the goodness of the gift itself.  Two verses from Proverbs speak of the good gift of marital companionship.  All things come from God.  Yet the proverbs encourage us to think of the gift of a wonderful spouse as a special blessing from God.

Proverbs 18:22

He who finds a wife finds a good thing,

And obtains favor from the LORD.

Proverbs 19:14

Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers,

But a prudent wife is from the LORD.

            To be without this good gift is normally a very difficult thing for a person to live with.

 

5.  Danger from Powerful Enemies that Oppress the Weak (12)

 

            The final problem of being alone is expressed in verse 12.  This is similar to the point being made in verse 10.  Both verses deal with danger.  Verse 10 speaks of an accident, while verse 12 refers to the intentional evil brought about by an enemy.  At times it may be difficult to distinguish between the accident and the intentional.  In both cases, the problem is deeper than a physical assault of some kind.  We face emotional and spiritual challenges as well.

            I want to read a passage to you now from a recent book entitled From Grief to Glory.  In it the author tells the account of the deepest trial that he and his wife ever faced, the loss of their infant son, who lived only 55 days.  In that struggle he and his wife had not only the comfort of each other, which I am sure was a great gift to them in their time of greatest distress.  They also benefited from the words of others such as Calvin, Luther, and Spurgeon, who had traveled this same road in a prior century.  This is what he writes:

        Looking back on the death of my son, I see now the value of trudging through life's struggles with others who have trod the same path.  "The soldier falters alone; but, in fellowship with his comrades, he advances with confidence."  As true as this is on the battlefield, so is it in times of grief.  Scripture proclaims this truth.  "Two are better than one," says Solomon, "because they have a good reward for their labor.  For if they fall, one will lift up his companion" (Eccl. 4:9-10).

        Such camaraderie may exist though time or great distance separates the soldiers, for this fellowship arises out of the shared experience.  Mark the words of the great English reformer Hugh Latimer who, shortly before being martyred for his faith in 1555, sent a farewell letter to fellow sufferers in which he wrote, "Set before you that though the weather is stormy and foul, yet you do not go alone; many others pass by the same path; their company might cause you to be the more courageous and cheerful."

            There is a richness in the heritage of godly sufferers that gives us companionship in the midst of the struggles that we face.  The struggles of singleness are real.  But there are answers for us that we find in this text.

 

Godliness with Contentment Concerning Singleness

 

            While the sixth verse of this chapter is most easily considered in the context of economic scarcity, it can be well-applied to the issue of companionship and singleness which we have been considering.

Better a handful with quietness

Than both hands full, together with toil and grasping for the wind.

            We need to pursue godliness with contentment in all areas of our lives.  As with other challenges of life, singleness, like poverty, must be considered within the sovereignty of God.  As the God who owns the cattle on a thousand hills can relieve poverty in an instant, the God who gives a good wife can bring the help of a godly spouse in an instant.  If He does not do that at the moment that we think is best, we can still have the peace of knowing that what He does is best, and that He has His good purposes in all that He does.  We need to understand that it is better to have contentment with our current condition (one handful), rather than to have a spouse (both hands full) and still be unsettled in our soul.  Ultimately it is not human companionship that will give us quietness, but only our assurance of the solid love and power of God for us.

            The question that you must answer is this.  Does Romans 8:28 apply to the singleness that you face as you desire to do the work that the Lord has set before you.  Let's take a look at that verse.

Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Can we count on the fact that despite the longing of a heart that yearns for a fuller measure of godly companionship, that the Lover of my soul is working out something good according to his eternal purpose?  The text says that "all things" work together for our good according to God's plan, and this includes the very significant matter of human companionship.

            As we seek a quietness of heart regarding our condition in life, there is one incorrect view of God's sovereignty that we must reject.  Everything that happens to us is not a result of God's punishment or reward of our good or bad behavior.  Do not assume that the lack of a spouse or a companion is an indication of God's disfavor.  You do not understand the fullness of God's plan for you, or the fullness of His wisdom in what He has given to you or withheld from you.  If you are poor in the goods of this world, you can not conclude that this is a sign of God's displeasure.  In the same way, you cannot allow yourself to believe the lie that your singleness is an indication that you do not enjoy the Lord's favor.

            While there is a view of the complex purposes of God that must be rejected, there is also a way of thinking about our scarcity that can prove to be very helpful as you seek a quietness of our heart regarding your marital status, or your condition of being alone in some task.  Here it is: Perhaps God wants you to understand the suffering of His Son more deeply.  Remember that Jesus was left alone to suffer and die for our sins as a single man.  When you feel alone, consider these words from Matthew's gospel: "Then all the disciples forsook Him and fled" (Matthew 26:56).  It is a good thing for us to be more deeply acquainted with the sufferings of Christ, and this may be part of the Lord's good purpose in the trial that you may be facing.

            But remember this.  Though you may feel alone, if you are in the body of Christ, you are not alone.  Most importantly you have the Lord Jesus Christ.  The one who suffered alone, has promised you that you will never be alone with these words: "I will never leave you nor forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5).  We are not alone in the body of Christ.  We have the Lord, and because of the union that we have in Christ, we have one another.

            Encourage your heart in the good purposes of God. 

Romans 8:32 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?

 

Seeking the Blessings of a Godly Marriage

 

            But do not think that seeking quietness of heart means that you can not take reasonable steps to have godly companionship.  Companionship in Christian endeavor is a good thing.  Friendship and marriage are wonderful gifts from God.  Seek them in prayer and seek them through responsible action. 

            I want to share with you a quote from the book Through Gates of Splendor  by Elizabeth Elliot.  The quote is about one of the men, Pete Fleming, who faced death at the hands of the Auca Indians, as he and four other men were attempting to communicate the Christian faith with this South American tribe.  Reflecting on Fleming's personal journal entries during the time when the mission to the Aucas was being planned, the author writes:

        ... (Pete) began thinking more about his own future.  And about his fiancée Olive Ainslie, a slim and beautiful girl, with dark eyebrows in striking contrast to lighter hair and blue eyes.  They had become engaged in an exchange of letters while he was in the jungle.  With typical candor this quiet, studious man wondered if there were any conflict between his coming marriage and his "call" to the Aucas?

        "Last night Nate and I talked a long time about the Auca problem," he wrote.  "Strangely enough, I do not feel my coming marriage will prohibit me from being eligible to help in efforts to reach them.  I feel that if pushed to it, Olive would rather have me die after we had lived together than to indefinitely postpone our wedding on the possibility that something fatal might happen.  Our life has become one, and I do not feel that God will separate us in our discernment of the will of God."

        In June, 1954, Pete felt free to return to the United States to marry Olive.

            Early in 1956, he and the four other men were dead.  He pursued a good gift, and was given that gift for a time.  Despite the dangers of this world, marriage is a beautiful thing.  There are some few that have been given a life-long gift of singleness (First Corinthians 7:7-9), but this is rare.

 

A Threefold Cord is Not Quickly Broken

 

            Finally, Solomon's words from this morning's text conclude with this interesting statement, "a threefold cord is not quickly broken."  He has been contrasting "one" and "two" throughout the passage, but now we hear a surprising "three."  What could it mean?  First, to make sure that we appreciate the illustration, understand that a rope that is made with three strings, rather than two or one, is stronger and harder to break.  There apparently is a third strand that can be added to the blessing of having a companion.

            On a human level, if we are working together for some good purpose, if two are working together, a third person may be able to offer help.  We have about seventy working toward God's purposes here, seventy-one will be helpful, provided that the additional person works with the common endeavor rather than against it.

            On the level of human and divine relationship, a couple united in marriage will be vastly strengthened by God's participation in their union.  This is not to say that the three are all equal partners.  It is to say that the couple is more than a couple.  They are united in another entity who is far greater than each of them, and far greater than their marriage.  This is also true of the church.  There are seventy people here engaged in common purpose, but if this is just another human organization, it will surely pass away.  But if those seventy are united to One who is far greater than all of them, and through Him to a large host of others from various times and places, then the enterprise will surely not fail.  The gates of hell shall not prevail against it.

            But with all societies, whether marital, ecclesiastical, or any other, sinful humans are involved and there will be much division and many feelings of loneliness - scarcity - even in the midst of being together and trying to work together.  There is a Threefold Cord without those the limitations of sinful humanity.  The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are united together in One Godhead with the full perfection of divine power, love, and unity.  This was the condition of God from before all eternity.

            But God, for His own glory, and because of the great love with which He loved us, set apart His Son for the work of our redemption - cross work, that we might be united to His Son as His body - the church.  This is the greatest love.  The Son has finished this work for you, and enjoys this perfect threefold cord for all eternity to come.  If you are in Him, whether you are married or single, you are not alone.  Rejoice in the love of God today, and have a quietness of heart regarding your condition in this fleeting world.